Here’s a real thought that I have been mulling over lately. Stick with me ok?
Why do we become disenchanted with who we are? Why don’t we ever get ENchanted with who we are? That might be a bold way to start this post, but hey…that’s how I roll (yes..I did just say “that’s how I roll”).
I received a really nice email just a couple days ago. A fellow mom wrote to me that us as stay at home moms, “…find it hard not to look around and compare ourselves with others and get down on ourselves.” Yes…I agree…100% yes.
Then my husband and I were chatting about him starting a blog…he voiced that he didn’t think he had anything to say. Um…that is very very wrong. But honestly, that is how I feel most of the time. I can’t wait to read his first blog post and I know he reads every single one of mine.
Just being honest here…I don’t feel I have much to say…much to give or much to display. I think that is why I go long stretches without blogging, not because I’m busy, but because I don’t feel what I have to say is worth anything to write about.
You have to realize, I am a God-fearing-believing-Bible-toting woman. If there was anyone who shouldn’t struggle about her self worth it should be me. The girl with a good childhood, didn’t (really) have a rebellious streak and has a close relationship with God.
And yet. I. still. do.
and you do too.
My goodness we have so much to say, so much to give and so much to write about. Why is it so hard sometimes? Because of fear. Fear that no one will read…fear that many people will read. Fear that we will get burned or criticized for who we are. Fear that we will be real but others will think we are not.
I want to become disenchanted with a life of self doubt. And become enchanted with a life grounded on God and on what He thinks of me and no one else.
I want Him to remove the film that lays thick on my eyes and skin. The film that tries to protect me from hurt and scars, but only leaves disease behind. The film that was put there last year by individuals who didn’t understand the love of God. The film that I put on myself every day when I say I have nothing to give. I want to be made whole and love what I do and do what I love.